Great Expectations

Elizabeth Bennet may say it is "but one poor sonnet" that will kill love, but I say it is expectations.

I have a lot of desires for my life. I want to be a good wife and step-mom. I want to run a successful business. I want to be a friend who truly listens. I don't think it is wrong to have desires, but what happens when those desires turn into expectations?

Mark, our pastor at The Journey North, preached a wonderful sermon on this several years ago. In it he said some words that I will never forget. "Expectations set a bar that those around you then have to live up to. You are saying: if you can't reach this goal I have set for you I will be frustrated, angry, or disappointed in you. When you have expectations, you are putting yourself over the other person, expecting them to meet your needs."

Yet, how easily my desires turn into expectations! I think we all naturally have an idea in our minds of the way things should be in our lives, preconceived notions of how events will turn out. I am very guilty of being sometimes inflexible, finding it hard to change my schedule to meet the needs of others. Yet, how much stress could we eliminate if we could just let go of all the things we think we know about how our lives should be and just trust.

You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you. - Isaiah 26:3

What does it mean to truly trust God? Could He even expect us to give up our very expectations of life, of other people, or even of ourselves? The short answer is: yes. It also means more peace for us. Don't forget that God's plan for our lives is the best plan, and our joy and his glory go hand in hand.